Lashings :p

Hitting a guy with a belt. first times, i guess they say it’ll never live up to your fantasies or whatever idk paraphrasing. Whatever the saying is it applies to first kisses, virginities, and i guess first whippings too.

there are ways it could’ve been better. maybe i could’ve hit his chest or face, but consent is important and it wasn’t given for those areas. Of course it could have been better if there was some begging and teary eyes but you can’t fake those it just wouldn’t have been impactful. And like no durr it would’ve been less awkward if we were drunk, but the whole purpose of the whipping was a trade for alcohol so that was a no-go.

Do I regret it? Absolutely NOT. Would I do it again? If I was drunk. Did I enjoy it? Well... somewhat, yes. Thinking back on it I feel fond of hitting him with a belt, but is that rose-tinted glasses? I'd have to do it again to know for sure. There was of course, the extremely disappointing factor of the lack of pink rhinestoned belt, I had to use a super LAME brown belt.

I still dream of a day I can see a guy crying and begging before me, the thought alone brings a smile to my face. Tis a shame that it must be such a rare occurrence, the only way to get consistent doses of a beautifully flushed, sobbing face would be like to be in a toxic relationship and I totes don’t want that. And engaging in bdsm like hitting stuff to get the tears? I’m not quite sure that’s my thing just yet.

Like… what if i scarred a guy’s skin… like no no no no i like the pale skin, and i like seeing the skin get red whether the cause is like the cold, alcohol or violent blows. I guess that is something that could’ve been better too, seeing the result of my hard work.

The rest of that night I really enjoyed though, took place at like the most insane home I have ever been in, good way of course. I literally saw the lights and was like "oh he lives next to like a pub or some other food and drink establishment" but no that was his home. And then you get into the 'cabin'... oh my god... the amount of dvds....................... it was simply glorious. My eyes lit up when I walked into that room and saw the abundance of physical media. The Craft, Scary Movie, Scott Pilgrim, Carrie, the sheer excellence of the collection was comparable to the Library of Alexandria. They did not however have Jordan Peele's best movie, Us, when they did have Nope and Get Out. A shame.

But then I got too drunk to function, was forced into a bed, sobbed and hyperventilated until I decided to leave, was caught and brought back. But wait until you hear the worst part… i was made to drink… MILK. And eat a… BANANA. Like, not bad in a vacuum. But then you compare calories to taste… those calories were NOT worth the taste. The only time drinking your calories is worth it is when it’s alcohol, or like a milkshake. And that milkshake would never be chocolate no no no NO! It will be vanilla, or banana, or strawberry. Oh and it BEEETTER be a thickshake not no milky pathetic excuse for a milkshake like NO that is just flavoured milk. Stop playing in my face with that bullshit.

To end on a good note though, I woke up and my hair looked fine, what a shocking new experience.