my little ponies

 

left to right order:

flutterdaniels, azzie pie, twizhy sparkle, apprestonjack, maxbow dash, and lyrity

Eep

 Guys this is my not-so-subtle plea for tiktok accounts so I can send you all edits like I have the kinds of edits I wanna send to all of you already in mind my desire to send edits is so STRONG.

Nasty Ahh Drinks

I am so, so... SO... sick of coffee. Coffee is amongst the most overrated things ever alongside chocolate and like, naruto as the top in sasunaru like they either freaky frotters or sasuke is the top. I have more to say on this but I digress.

First time I remember having coffee is going to starbucks the first time as a kid after seeing it all over social media... YUCK. The pinkity drinkity was a LIE. And the next memorable moment was a coffee shot I had at a restaraunt, similarly nasty.

And chocolate... hot, fucking chocolate. Typical chocolate, invading spaces in which it was never invited but not like in my own funny meme way.

What do these drinks have in common? Heat, they are hot drinks. What kind of person would stomach drinking a hot liquid... that's right, demons. People who enjoy drinking hot beverages simply have something wrong and demonic about them. Whether they are a demon, are infested with a demonic parasite, or any other infernal affliction.

Like why would you ever want a hot, steaming, substance gulping down your throat??? It's just not natural, like homosexuality which shares the same hellish origins. 

Coffee, tea, hot chocolate, throw em ALL in the gaping hell mouth they originated from.

Stick to life-giving water, yummy thick milkshakes, and delicious sugar free, calorie free sodas :p

Lashings :p

Hitting a guy with a belt. first times, i guess they say it’ll never live up to your fantasies or whatever idk paraphrasing. Whatever the saying is it applies to first kisses, virginities, and i guess first whippings too.

there are ways it could’ve been better. maybe i could’ve hit his chest or face, but consent is important and it wasn’t given for those areas. Of course it could have been better if there was some begging and teary eyes but you can’t fake those it just wouldn’t have been impactful. And like no durr it would’ve been less awkward if we were drunk, but the whole purpose of the whipping was a trade for alcohol so that was a no-go.

Do I regret it? Absolutely NOT. Would I do it again? If I was drunk. Did I enjoy it? Well... somewhat, yes. Thinking back on it I feel fond of hitting him with a belt, but is that rose-tinted glasses? I'd have to do it again to know for sure. There was of course, the extremely disappointing factor of the lack of pink rhinestoned belt, I had to use a super LAME brown belt.

I still dream of a day I can see a guy crying and begging before me, the thought alone brings a smile to my face. Tis a shame that it must be such a rare occurrence, the only way to get consistent doses of a beautifully flushed, sobbing face would be like to be in a toxic relationship and I totes don’t want that. And engaging in bdsm like hitting stuff to get the tears? I’m not quite sure that’s my thing just yet.

Like… what if i scarred a guy’s skin… like no no no no i like the pale skin, and i like seeing the skin get red whether the cause is like the cold, alcohol or violent blows. I guess that is something that could’ve been better too, seeing the result of my hard work.

The rest of that night I really enjoyed though, took place at like the most insane home I have ever been in, good way of course. I literally saw the lights and was like "oh he lives next to like a pub or some other food and drink establishment" but no that was his home. And then you get into the 'cabin'... oh my god... the amount of dvds....................... it was simply glorious. My eyes lit up when I walked into that room and saw the abundance of physical media. The Craft, Scary Movie, Scott Pilgrim, Carrie, the sheer excellence of the collection was comparable to the Library of Alexandria. They did not however have Jordan Peele's best movie, Us, when they did have Nope and Get Out. A shame.

But then I got too drunk to function, was forced into a bed, sobbed and hyperventilated until I decided to leave, was caught and brought back. But wait until you hear the worst part… i was made to drink… MILK. And eat a… BANANA. Like, not bad in a vacuum. But then you compare calories to taste… those calories were NOT worth the taste. The only time drinking your calories is worth it is when it’s alcohol, or like a milkshake. And that milkshake would never be chocolate no no no NO! It will be vanilla, or banana, or strawberry. Oh and it BEEETTER be a thickshake not no milky pathetic excuse for a milkshake like NO that is just flavoured milk. Stop playing in my face with that bullshit.

To end on a good note though, I woke up and my hair looked fine, what a shocking new experience.

Seminal Post (Reupload)

Recently had a very productive conversation with a good judy, found out she is brilliant of mind, a philosopher of the modern day. Just like myself, like Woah Vicky, like Paris Mwendwa, like Ivy Wolke. What is the truth of which we agreed on?

THE GLORY OF SUBMISSIVE, NEEDY, WHINY MEN.

Truly there is nothing better, nothing better than seeing a guy’s face all sad, teary, red with his lips quivering and all. Oh to hear the desperation in a guy’s voice, to hear it crack with so much visceral need. Now I would never listen to a Drake song but I been hearing a lyric that goes something like “I just wanna see a boy beg on the pavement” and YESSSS!!! That’s what I wanna see too. That’s what we ALL WANT TO SEE.

I would go to the ends of the earth for a needy guy, a cute needy guy. It would make everything worth it. All the pain, tears and misery would be worth it for that. What is life without love but a slow march toward death? And what I love is needy somewhat-pathetic handsome guys.

In the words of Modern Philosopher, Zhyrra (2026, Instagram DMs). Men are biologically submissive and needy. A very wise and thought-provoking statement wouldn’t you agree o’readers? She also states “the whimpering sounds of a tortured man denied pleasure are comparable to the arias sung in ye old days” (2026, Instagram DMs). Perhaps one of the most profound things ever spoken, one of the most eye-opening truths of our collective species.

“Women only want one thing and its men on their knees, snot down their noses, and puffed-face crying. Does it matter at all why? Obviously no. Its programmed like the AI pushing male whimpering audios in my algorithm. Like my thumb hitting the repost button .5s into lucasdustinwillmikeAUGH At the end of the day we do not choose our preference. Such as why men are naturally clingy, submissive, and needy. They can't help who they are and who am I to deny them of a god-given right to be pathetic. Safe to say that if a man cries or whines in my vicinity, they are exactly where they ought to be; pitied, loved, and cared for.” (Zhyrra, 2026, Instagram DMs).

More sage wisdom, to end this all off: if a cute guy is sad or crying in my presence, I may hide my reaction, but know I am loving every second of it and wanting to hug and cuddle him with every ounce of my being.